I’m just a soul trying to figure out what it means to LIVE!

Another day has gone, yet, I still feel exactly the same... hurt and mind fucked. Excuse my verbal abuse, it usually happens when I'm just sick of pretending or withholding what I really feel. So what's the best way to deal, for me, right now? Going through the motions of what I'm feeling. The look on my face when I saw you for the very first time, my high school crush. The one that got away until our paths crossed again on the New Year of 2016. Was it just my luck or was it a curse I asked myself these days. Were you just sent for a season, and for some reason, we opened up a can of worms that was never supposed to be open. Opening up old wounds that bear no closure to the past, just a distant memory that will haunt our souls forever. I loved you like you loved me once upon a time, and when we exchanged words of love, it actually carried weight, a weight that helped us get through the first year and a bit... and then it happened. That small doubt you had in us made y...

WOW, its been a while since I've put a pen on paper, or my fingers on my laptop's keyboard and just releasing what's inside of me over here. I've been going through a tough stage in my life... a period that has forced me to look from within. It fucking hurts I tell you, but I try and take it one day at a time. I find myself in a space where work is tough, and so is the love I have for someone. I've decided to retract my emotions and plow it into working harder, longer hours, just to keep my mind occupied. But alas, everything starts creeping in eventually and you have no choice but to face it head-on, it's like I'm refusing to face what's staring me right in my face. I'm a lost soul, seeking answers from others when all the answers are right in front of me. I thought I was dating the love of my life, but it turns out he crushed it. The constant torment of your silence, reading but not acknowledging. The constant weeping over a man who was jus...